Coping with debt: Some simple truths

If you’ve read the introduction you already know that when the gravity of my situation, the enormity of my debt, finally dawned upon me that I broke down and cried. It might be more accurate to say that I came very near to a nervous breakdown. I not only cried, I hyperventilated, I paced back and forth for hours, I had thoughts of self-harm.

After days of this, I woke up and I realized that I needed to anchor myself to some simple truths and plans in order to stay sane. Here is what I told myself:

FIRST: YOU ARE NOT ALONE

Did you know that Americans owe roughly $870 billion in credit card debt? The average American owes around $5,331 in credit card debt, which is about a third as much as I owe, but 8% of credit card holders have more than $10,000 in debt. It’s not exactly a common experience, but it isn’t unheard of! More than that, 40% of cardholders report that they make only the minimum monthly payment, indicating that their debts are as much or more than they can handle. While it doesn’t make me happy to know others are suffering.

SECOND: THERE’S A WAY FORWARD

There is nothing more demoralizing than seeing how little a dent the minimum monthly payment makes in your total balance. Nevertheless, when you’re dealing with a large amount of debt, you need to be patient and disciplined, and realize that every little bit can count. If you’re consistent and keep making regular payments, and finding ways to go over the minimum where you can, the balance will come down and life will become easier. As the balance comes down, each regular payment will mean more and more. While it may be your gut reaction to simply despair when you get a load of your crushing debt, stay focused and start creating a plan. You will rest easier.

THIRD: TRY TO BE HAPPY

When you feel as though you’re trapped in a hopeless situation it can be hard to see what you have going for you. Do you have a solid network of friends and family? Are you healthy? Do you have hobbies that don’t add to your debt? Do you live in a city with a wealth of things to do for free? Do you have a dog who greets you at the door each day when you come home? Do you have past accomplishments you can look to with pride? If you don’t, think about how you can build and cultivate these things. Misery is exhausting, and if you’re exhausted you wont be able to think straight and get yourself out of this mess. Do you have health insurance? If so, a visit to a therapist might be a worthwhile use of the money you have left over after making your monthly payments. If not, there are many therapy sources available that offer services on a sliding scale.

FOURTH: FIND YOUR EXTRA GEAR

My day job is intense and exhausting, it requires my full attention and effort. Yet I know that if I don’t find another source of income somehow that I am never going to get out of the hole I’m in. This means finding a way to do a little extra. If I can find a way to work just a few hours a week not only to develop a small side income, but to work hard in my current job so that I can advance in my field, I can get out of this. I simply need to be disciplined and patient. There is money to be had if I’m willing to scratch for it, keep grinding, and not lose hope.

FIFTH: LEARN WHAT YOU CAN LIVE WITHOUT

While I want to avoid the condescending territory of articles that talk about avocado toast it is important to have a serious conversation with yourself about what you’re willing to live without. Can you live off of beans, rice, and potatoes and give up fancier foods? Can you give up coffee? Can you give up beer? Can you give up cable TV? Can you give your your Netflix subscription? Can you give up your car (and the insurance that goes with it)? The answer to some of these questions may be “no,” but everything has to be considered.

FINALLY: STOP ACCUMULATING MORE DEBT

This may seem simple, but credit cards can be very tempting and alluring, with the promise of miles and cash back bonuses. I need to lock them away until better days.

Once I told myself these things and confronted them fearlessly it did not make me feel instantly better, but it gave me a sense of purpose and resolve that I could get through this. Is there another mantra you can think of that we could add to the list?

Introduction: The Broke Humanist

Hello, my name is John Block. I am 35 years old, I have a PhD, I work full time, and a few days ago I realized that I was almost totally broke.

How did this happen? Well as it turns out being a graduate student in the humanities doesn’t pay all that much. While I didn’t take out any new debt to get my PhD, I had to live off of a stipend that didn’t amount to a whole lot. Low on funds, I was lured by credit cards and lived beyond my means. While some of the purchases I made on credit were necessities or things that could advance my career, I can completely cop to having been irresponsible in many ways. When I finally landed a job in my field, I had to move across country, which racked up even more debt. Worse still, my new job was in one of the most expensive cities in the USA, and I knew no one in town, so I had to get an apartment alone. While I had the great new job it came with expenses I’d failed to account for: replacing my student health insurance with an expensive employer based plan and having to pay into a mandatory retirement plan I hadn’t accounted for in estimating my cost of living. This was to say nothing of the student loan debt from my B.A., deferred during my graduate program, that was finally coming due.

A few weeks into the job I continued to coast, deliberately ignoring the disparity between my paycheck and my rising credit card balances. Yet each day the nagging fear and the mounting anxiety seemed to grow until a few days ago I was finally forced to confront that things were very, very wrong. I ran the numbers and I broke down crying. When I tallied up my rent, my bills, my student loan payment, and (worst of all) my minimum monthly credit card payments, I was looking at about $191 per month to buy food, put gas in my car (and insure it!), and to cover extravagances like replacing clothes and shoes when they get holes in them. Forget retirement, forget savings, forget the future.

Worst of all, the situation appeared entirely hopeless. While I was lucky enough to be able to afford the minimum monthly payments on my debts, when I ran the long term math it seemed to promise me that I would be stuck in this miserable situation for the next 20 years.

When the enormity of the situation dawned on me, I alternated between pacing back and forth across my apartment, and sitting on my couch and crying. My mind went to very dark places. To put it bluntly, I had just about the shittiest four days of my life.

When I finally put myself back together, I decided I was not going to take the situation lying down. What I needed was a plan, what I needed was perspective, patience, and discipline. While I knew there wasn’t a magic bullet that could take care of this problem overnight, I knew that if I could hustle a bit harder, save a bit more, and get a little creative, that I could work my way out of this thing.

I started this blog to share my experience with others who may find themselves in a similar situation so that they might benefit from know that they are not alone, and that my experiences and efforts to work my way out of crushing debt might help others. I hope, also, that you might share your own experiences and ideas with me and that maybe we could create a whole community of broke people trying to be a little less broke. I also started it because it feels therapeutic to get this off of my chest. My debt makes me feel ashamed, demoralized, anxious, stressed, and depressed, but I’ve realized that the more I talk about it, and hash things out, the better I feel.

So welcome, I hope that this story, and the experiences I share here, can be helpful to people out there.